The One Essential Rule for Seat Trading on Airplanes

Yesterday, I had an opportunity to do something nice, albeit meaningless, for someone on an airplane. And, although I’m typically far too nice to my own detriment, I actually said no this time. A woman seated next to me on an airplane asked if I would trade seats with her husband so they could sit together.

Her husband was in a middle seat across the way, surrounded by oversized humans. I was on the aisle (with the woman sitting in the middle next to me), lamenting the fact my first-class upgrade didn’t clear. Yes, I’m snobby that way. Turning down her generous offer was somewhat of a surprise to myself, as I normally do nice things for people, whether you believe it or not. But this was a 2.5-hour flight, and I was in my favorite non-first-class seat on the plane, and it was as relaxed as I possibly could’ve been based on everything involved, after 13 days of near-no-sleep hard work.

And here I am explaining myself, as if I did something wrong. That’s the problem: I did nothing wrong, but am forced to feel guilty because I, a ticketed passenger in my proper seat, prevented a husband and wife from sitting next to each other.

The Rule: You Cannot Ask Someone to Trade Down

Aisle seats are the best seats. Windows are next (depending on passenger preference, this may be reversed). The absolute truth is middle seats are the worst. You cannot try to give anyone a middle seat in exchange for anything other than another middle seat.

If you have a first-class seat, you may seek any other seat on the plane (this may sound asinine, but I’ve seen this happen, and in fact have given up a first-class seat myself on more than one occasion). If you have an aisle seat, you may seek another aisle seat. Likewise with window seats. If you have an aisle seat and prefer the window and someone has a window seat who prefers the aisle, you may make that trade.

The person requesting the trade must take an equivalent or worse seat—never better. It’s insulting to ask someone to give up a better seat for your hideous middle seat.

Respectable Reaction

I should note, this woman was not horrible and either fully understood my denial or at least was good about hiding her disdain for me. I’ve seen far worse exchanges on airplanes. However, her being gracious about me not giving up my seat does little more than make me feel extra guilt for turning down this nice woman’s chance to sit by her husband.

In fact, as she was preparing to purchase an alcoholic beverage, I even gave her a free-drink coupon as some way to alleviate my guilt. Why do I feel guilty? Society, that’s why. The person who is in the right has to feel wrong because I don’t know why. Thanks, society.