The Three Stages of Life

This is an important topic, as we may be living with the final generation that will understand due to social media changing[1] everything, but it’s one that must be discussed: real-life socializing.

Throughout life, you’ll have to interact with people. Usually, these mandatory mingling sessions involve co-workers or strangers you encounter during brief economic transactions, but when it comes to friendships, there are three distinct stages of life. By the time you reach stage three, you know you’ve been through the first two, and you might even make an effort to return, but you’re finished.

1. When you get together.

You’re young. Your friends are your neighbors. You don’t have a driver’s license. When you want to get together with a friend, you go to that person’s house and you enjoy each other’s company. Or, you fight viciously, trade vile words of hatred and go your separate ways until two hours later when you’re best friends again.

The point is you put no delay on your desire to get together and actually getting together. You have real friendship, real social interaction and a real chance at succeeding in society.

2. When you realize “should” means “won’t.”

As you’re young, you’re too busy experiencing things for the first time to pay attention to what your parents are saying and doing unless it directly pertains to you. One day, though, you’ll figure out you are too young to be naïve. You’ll start wondering, “Why do my parents always say they should get together with Mr. and Mrs. Surname, but then never get together with them?”

You’ve reached the second stage of life. While you still get together with your friends whenever you want, you see adults all around you telling each other they should get together. They won’t. They may never see those people again. All they do is make small talk in the ultimate sham of life, lying to each other under the guise of legitimate hope.

A good spot to truly experience this phenomenon is at a high-school graduation open house. Young humans, excited to be graduating while being doused with money they didn’t earn, bask in their naivety of maintaining their current unbreakable friendships forever. All around them, adults who haven’t seen each other in years give each other the business laugh in a social setting, ending every sham of a conversation with “We should get together.”

No one will ever pull out a calendar at that point and actually set a time, even when said calendar is right there on the mobile device these scumbags cannot put in their pockets for even a moment. No one will give a rough rundown of a weekly schedule. Saying we should get together is just another way of saying, “Goodbye forever,” bringing relief to all participants of that conversation who didn’t have another hearty chuckle left.

Then, the graduate moves away and loses all those friends they used to have. That’s because, while not intentional at first—the person is legitimately busy, suddenly there’s a significant geographical distance, etc.—the graduate reaches stage three.

3. When you don’t get together.

The first time you say it, you might clarify it to convince yourself you haven’t reached stage three. “We should get together some time. For real. Not like those fake promises people make.”

The second time you say it, you might also clarify it, but not as much. “We should get together some time. For real.”

You know what’s going on, though. You’re not going to get together with any of these people. How often does “should” turn into an immediate setting of a date? Never. You are old, you’ve lost all your friends you thought would be with you through life, and you now use “should” as a synonym of “won’t.”

It doesn’t matter. You’re making new friends who won’t care about you once they get married and have kids. Then, maybe you’re getting married or having kids or doing the opposite and trying to make a big deal out of it, whichever route you choose.

Whatever the case, you’re not getting together with anyone. But you should.

[1] Ruining